The Aurora Beacon News

March 14, 2008

 

Sometimes, tears do the Talking


By Christine S. Moyer

Oswego East hosts retreat for teens

Tamy Nutoni exhaled deeply.

She puffed up her cheeks, then emptied her lungs as she stood on the steps leading to the stage in Oswego East High School's auditorium Thursday morning.

She grabbed her daughter Faith's hand and just stared out at the crowd of around 100 Oswego East students for a moment, not saying anything.

Nutoni's step-daughter, 15-year-old Jessica Nutoni, was their age when she died in an early-morning car crash in Oswego on Feb. 11, 2007.

It's been more than a year now since the accident that killed five Oswego teens and injured three others. But the pain is still there, so Nutoni spoke through tears.

"The message I want all of you to realize is that your parents don't want to get a 7 a.m. call that you're never coming home," she said into a microphone. "Death is a permanent thing. That's it. You're not coming back."

On Thursday, Oswego East held its annual TALK (Teens Activating Language of Kindness) retreat, which promotes communication and acceptance among students.

The daylong event began with a performance by the issues-oriented MWAH! (Messages Which are Hopeful) performing Arts Troupe. The area youths addressed issues ranging from abusive relationships and anorexia to the shooting at Northern Illinois University and the 2007 crash in Oswego.

The group's director, Ray Moffitt, invited Jessica Nutoni's father to speak during the performance.

But Nutoni said her husband doesn't know what to say anymore. So she tried to explain the pain to the students.

"It's been very hard for us," she said. "It's getting a little easier, but we'll never get over it."

The crowd of students sat still, not whispering, playing with their hair or squirming in their seats.

They listened as Nutoni urged them to talk to their parents and to be strong enough to fight against peer pressure.

Thursday's retreat intended to show the participating students that "we are all more similar than we think, and to urge teens not to judge each other," said Oswego East social worker Dina Schnable.

Although the day's focus was not on the Oswego crash or underage drinking, the students were moved by Nutoni's words.

When the performance ended, they cheered and filed out of the auditorium.

They hurried past Nutoni and her daughter who remained seated, squeezing each other's hands and staring straight ahead.

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Jessica Nutoni's stepmom, Tamy Nutoni, with Jessica's sister, Faith, at her side, spoke during the TALK (Teens Activating Language of Kindness) retreat at Oswego East High School March 13. Lending emotional support to the stepmom is Chris Oechsel. (right) of the MWAH! Performing Arts Troupe. Jessica Nutoni was one of the five Oswego teenagers who died in an alcohol-related crash on February 11, 2007.
(photo by Heather Eidson of the Aurora Beacon News)

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Three members of the Pitney family from Cherry Valley - (from left) Blake, Holly, and Morgan - perform their original song 'Life Goes On' at Oswego East High School on March 14 as part of the MWAH! Performing Arts Troupe presentation for a teen leadership conference.
(photo by Heather Eidson of the Aurora Beacon News)

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Whitney McDermott (left) and Alex Oechsel of the MWAH! troupe perform as part of the TALK (Teens Activating Language of Kindness) retreat at Oswego East High School.
(photo by Heather Eidson of the Aurora Beacon News)

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MWAH! troupe member Whitney McDermott of Rockford sings the song 'Hero' to an Oswego East High School student during the performance on March 14. Looking on are (from left) Blake Pitney and Michael Todd Emery, 17-year-old teen co-director of the troupe and a junior at Oswego East.
(photo by Heather Eidson of the Aurora Beacon News)